my moo theory

i just found out that some chick up in connecticut has the hots for my hubby. she saw his goofy face on my pal's friendster page and thought, "he's cute!!" and immediately asked for an 'intro-intro'...

my first reaction, "elehhhh, ni mesti budak gemok and comot mana ni" as is usually the case with him and his admirers. but then i opened up her friendster page and lo and behold, the lady is smokin' hot!! well, not as hot as moi of course, otherwise why would he choose me over some other sepet and boncit girls out there, right? so after 15 gallery views and much scrutinizing, i flipped. i mean, how dare this surgeon-to-be wants to gatai-gatai with MY man!!

then i landed on solid ground. she's not with him. i am. why the melodrama then?

statistics show that nearly 60 percent of marriages today end in bitter divorces and many of those instances were due to the 'intrusion' of a third party. left and right, a number of my closest girlfriends have suffered sleepless nights, endless tears and a lifetime of heartbreak because the men in their lives decided to do a little 'after school research' to determine the color of the grass on the other side.

the blame is not solely the husbands' i say because the female cows grazing on those so called 'greener' pastures are made up of a new kind of breed -- the "tak mau bra" breed (i.e. the "tak tau malu" cloned with the "berani mati" breed). no longer are they a bunch of lazy hot blooded mammals content on mixing around with their own herd, these new age female cows are focused and fully committed in jumping across the fence to fraternize with the other livestocks. and that's what am afraid of most...

don henley strongly believes that "sometimes love just ain't enough" to which i say, i hear ya. if it's merely love, then i would have been married a long, long time ago... back when i had more hair on my head and more spring in my step. but i chose to play the waiting game and after 6 months, 17 days and 24 minutes, am happy to report that i made the right decision (... so far). God sent me a man who shares my religious beliefs, funny, temperamental, smart, loving, competitively anal, mature (well, almost), kind, a great friend. it's better than hitting the jackpot, it's almost as if i've won a lifetime supply of food at the local all-you-can-eat-chicken-buffet -- it's that good of a feeling. i finally feel secure.

and that's the first big mistake am making. if i should learn anything from my 'wounded' friends, it's never to feel secure about your marital bond, no matter how strong you believe it is. look at datuk k's ex, christie brinkley, hillary clinton. none of these women saw it coming, then bam! bye-bye happy marriage, hello tramp...

i may have really lucked out with MY man but as long as those "tak mau bra" cow breed exists, i vow to never rest easy. and if any one of them dare to come near my side of the green, i'll make sure to pull a reaaally mad cow on the bitch!

where art thou dr. spock?

i don't know what to write about anymore. my days are mundane, my nights, toksah cerita la. i've memorized the damn tv guide dari depan sampai lah ke belakang. and after so many social faux pas (e.g. mengumpat person a to person b only to realize, waaay into the thrashing session, that the two are actually closely connected!!), i've kept to the mantra, "if you got nutin' smart to say, then shut it." my life stories and my thoughts, i felt, was not worth sharing.

then bindi re-surfaced into my life. and my brain went into an overdrive.

i've never been a big fan of steve irwin. i first saw him on tv years ago, animated fellow that croc hunter. i don't know much about his wildlife conservation work but through my equally animated friend z (he loves to imitate steve's on-camera 'crikey' antics), i understood that mr. irwin meant a lot of good things to a lot of living beings. his tragic passing on september 4th last year, brought a public outpouring of sorrow once reserved for the princess of wales. "even creatures, great or small, grieved because they've lost the best friend they ever had." i didn't watch much of his memorial service, but i managed to catch irwin's very own 'wildlife warrior' at her best. i fell in love, in awe, instantly.

now, four months later, bindi is back. i watched her on ellen, access hollywood and i even stayed up late just to see her shine on larry king live. with proud mom terri by her side, bindi is all gusto and adult composure, talking about her hero and passion for continuing his wildlife legacy. now this kid is eight and she just lost her beloved daddy but listening to her talk about making the world, especially the animal world, a much better place, you can't help but wonder about the kind of parenting she had and continues to have.

how do you raise a child to be so thoughtful, kind, strong and smart like bindi? i know a number of children who are wise beyond their years but most who are gifted this way, i have to say, are 'socially inept.' either they are shy or insolent or just completely too cutesy they become irritating after a while. it's almost as if smartness comes at a heavy price -- no parent, no matter how much time and good they put into a child, can ever have that 'balanced' package. at least not when they're eight.

i hope to have a kid in this lifetime but how do i do it right? of course no one's perfect but don't you want your child to have bindi-like qualities? to beam with pride and not cringe everytime your little 'angel' opens his/her mouth. to be able to let your tiny tot run loose into the world without having to apologize profusely to the entire hospital waiting room coz' your 'precious' is sprawled on the floor wailing and with his pants down. to know that she is not always about 'things' but sometimes about thoughtfulness. how, do tell me, do you raise a child that's on the mark?

i know they've cloned dolly the sheep but can they clone bindi the sweet?

*go to youtube.com and type 'bindi on ellen degeneres' for latest footage. problems uploading

biskut oh biskut

damn you martha stewart for making me look bad in the kitchen... the pistachio raisin biscotti you said was waaay easy to make burnt to hell!! and yes, i did, like a complete idiot, try to scrape off all the 'kesan hangus'... now am left with more crumbs than biscotti. and i hate you guida de laurentis, with all your perky exuberance and white pearly teeth, for looking completely 'untarnished' at the end of your 30-minute show. i still have all this gunk in my hair so no, i do not wanna try anymore of your everyday italian recipes!!

little miss sunshine indeed!

for those who haven't seen this lil' sundance genius... go, go, go check it out. kitaorang ketawa sampai guling-guling atas tanah... ok i exaggerate. sampai nak terkincit jugak lah. what a great way to start the new year!